cheddar cheese, raspberries, and honey due

sigh...i just felt the urge to sit down and type.

where to begin?

this year has gone by so fast. and saying that i've gone through it alone would be quite the lie. god's been here doing some really neat stuff. my family. especially ma. and da has said some really important stuff. i'm sure when i look back on this year i've grown. how could i not? my first year out of high school. and chugging through work. gah. thank goodness that is over next friday. the whole nine months i've been working at this job i have been waiting for august 10th. when it will all be over.

although i have had wonderful family in my life i've felt very lonely. i haven't had a friend that i've really felt i connected with for some time now. i've had three in my life, perhaps four. and two of them i've pushed away. (it's not as simple as that, really) to be perfectly honest i'm longing (however dumb that word may sound) for a friend that i can really connect with. a friend that pushes me to be better. i want something new.

i've decided to start reading the bible from beginning to end. i started a few days ago. i've never actually done it before. and the first chapter has just made me be in awe of people. i mean not looking at all of it. because it pretty much goes to shit after that. but just the creation of the world; etc. looking at people and the earth as art work. because it really is. no matter how amazing renaissance artists were, artists in general, poets; etc. god is the..best. to say the least. it's sad to see how we've torn, polluted, and misused god's canvases. people treasure and show so much more appreciation for a painting by van gogh than they would ever think about treasuring their own body or the world around them.

i suppose those are my thoughts for now.